You did not just say that

We are lucky to boast customers from all over the world, from all walks of life and ages.  Most of our customers are polite, friendly, pleasant and appreciative.  We love them.  Occasionally, however, we get a few wacky ones in the mix…the ones that make you scratch your head and chuckle and every so often the ones that make you wonder about the state of mankind in general.   I’d like to share with you a few of the things people have actually communicated to us.

(Small print:  I feel it necessary to point out that with over 16,000 orders under our belt, we deal with a lot of different people on a regular basis…it keeps us sane to share a sense of humor about our day to day tasks, and we know that sometimes we ALL say things that don’t really come out quite as we expected!  Having said that, enjoy…)

1. When inadvertently sent stones with the word “Hope” instead of “Courage”, a customer called to inform us that he was very upset and needed to return them because he ‘didn’t believe in hope.’  (If that doesn’t send you home depressed, I don’t know what will…)
2. When we were unable to meet a customer’s deadline for some custom engraved stones, she finished a 15 minute rant with ‘these stones were supposed to save lives.’ (Well if that’s the case, we are WAY undercharging.)
3. When asking for a discount price on an already deeply discounted order, one customer told us that she had just spent $45,000 getting a doctorate and that she was currently ‘financially drained.’  (Yeah honey, aren’t we all.)
4. After placing an order, a customer asked how quickly we shipped ‘because I’m on oxygen and don’t have much time left.  I hope I’m still alive when they get here.’  (It’s important to note that she’s been a returning customer for 2 years now…)
5. When a customer saw one of our tokens that depicts a Buddha, she declared ‘I need to do Buddhism ’cause he’s just so darn cute!’ (Yes, I’m fairly certain that most people that ‘do Buddhism’ follow the religion because of its ‘darn cute’ deity.)
6. In the notes section of an order: ‘Please throw package over fence.’ (While we pride ourselves on great customer service, personal delivery of packages just isn’t cost effective.  However, if we were to personally deliver a package, I can assure you that there would be no ‘throwing’ involved…)
7. A woman called in to buy a gift and as she was choosing her stones, she asked ‘which words do you think my daughter would like?’ (Um, you do realize that we don’t actually know your daughter?!)
8. Often we get requests to ‘send the best and prettiest ones you have’ of a particular item.  (Good thing you specified that, because otherwise we send our worst and ugliest.)
9. We are an office full of women.  One customer called several times and each time someone different answered the phone.  Her response?  “Oh, are you all sisters?” (Several different women + same office = sisters?  Not quite sure how that equation works, but OK!)
10. When we went back and forth with a customer concerning a package that she was insisting she had not received, we were perplexed.  We had shipped it in a timely manner and the tracking confirmed it had been delivered.  So, we were very relieved when, a few days later, the customer called to let us know that she had found the package…’under some stuff on top of the refrigerator’… (Well of course!  On top of the refrigerator is the 1st place I always look for missing packages…)

So thank you for the laughs.  We look forward to filling our next 16,000 orders, smiling the whole way.